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Some of the Expats Living In The Philippines…
Some of the guys living in the Philippines are less than ideal. Yes, I know that is an understatement and what your ideal is will be different from my own. I’ve been a bit hard on some of the Filipina. Some of them deserve it, others do not. I think it is only fair to look at us foreigners living in the Philippines.
I have been thinking for a while that I need to write an article about some of the men that come to the Philippines. I try really hard not to judge people. I will try to continue with that even in this post. At the same time, these things should help to bring understanding why Filipina might just lie to you. I’m sure some of the online girls that are out to make a dollar didn’t start out that way. They evolved into after being treated really bad.
Sometimes the guys are just like the ladies. They mean everything they say but they never go through with it. Sometimes they don’t go through with it fast enough to suit the girl too. The web is full of fantasy. Therapist offices are full of people that spend too much of their life in fantasy and much of that is on the web.
I like what Chris Rock said about men and their loyalty. He said we are as loyal as our options. Okay, a few men are not like that but most men are. They will do what they think they can get away with when it comes to women. We are easily tempted. It is in our genes.
Probably the worst I’ve seen are the guys that could care less if they get a Filipina pregnant and then disappear. This one is hard for me not to judge. Make a child and leave it to survive however it can and never look back. It happens, the guys have talked to me about it.
Some people just are so wrapped up in themselves they cannot see the harm they do to others. Often these people suffer from Anti Social Personality Disorder or Narcissistic Personality Disorder.
I can spot these folks pretty quickly. They also tend to get into trouble as they think the world revolves around them. They think if something is okay to them, then it is okay with the world. I don’t have a problem with someone living their life the way they think they should. I really don’t. I’ve also learned that you cannot caution people like this. They are unreachable. They also wreak a lot of pain in the lives of those around them.
Probably more expats fall into this group than does the normal population. Just a hunch but people like this might not have close family ties. Lacking such ties makes it easier to pull up stakes and travel around the world. No, I don’t assume this of the expats living in the Philippines when I meet them. I’m only speaking of general terms and wonder about it. There are many factors that could leave a person without close family ties. There are many factors that make living in the Philippines a good choice for some. Some though, can’t leave their family behind. Those that have had their family disown them would be more likely to be able to make the move to the Philippines.
Not long ago, I wrote a story about a Filipina faking a hospital receipt. I was talking with a restaurant owner about that and he said “Hey, the guys do that crap too.” He went on to say that “I had a guy the other day say here is P1000, please give me a receipt for P400 with last weeks date on it.” I can be slow and didn’t understand. The guy explained he probably need to prove to a girl where he was.
Then there are the sexpats living in the Philippines. You know, I could care less myself. If you want to come here for fun then by all means have it. That is a term that really has no definition. I would be surprised if it has never been applied to me. I’d probably enjoy it if my options allowed it. haha
The guys that come for underage girls though, that’s a different matter. I won’t even go into it from a moral standpoint. Morals shift from one place in the world to the next. I don’t feel it is my place to preach what is moral to someone else.
I will say this, young women in the Philippines tend to be quite naive overall. Most don’t think the way we do. Sexual things and the word malice are used almost as synonyms within Filipino culture. I was kind of shocked the first time a Filipina said to me “No malice intended.” it just didn’t compute with me. It is a good example of how different our thinking is.
I would say this even fits under one of the things I don’t like about living in the Philippines. It could be called hypocrisy. That happens all over the world and wherever it happens it makes me tense. Especially coming from someone close to me.
Filipina have a lot of family pressure on them and yhr outbreak of a scandal around their name brings them much fear. It brings shame to the family and that is something they are generally terrified of. People love to judge others here, it seems to be a national pastime.
This massively different way of thinking sets the stage for many problems. One of them is our way of thinking in the West about sex and the Filipino way of thinking about it.
Most Filipina under the age of 18 are quite innocent. That can lead to you not understanding their actions. They may be in awe of a foreigner. These things can set the average Filipina up to be easily manipulated. Even if that isn’t your intention.
For some, that is the intention, they come here to seek out underage girls. The problem I have with it is these girls are just not ready to be making these kind of choices. There hormones don’t wait until their brain is ready for the normal human feelings they have.
When things do go too far, they may be overwhelmed with guilt and fear of being discovered. That can cause you a lot of trouble. Trouble like a long time in jail. And it can lead to serious harm to the child’s self esteem. This is especially true in a culture where casual sex and malice are seen as equal.
And then when it his the press, it causes a lot of animosity toward the rest of the expats living in the Philippines. The kids are not ready, stay away from them!
Beware Of Expats Living In The Philippines
Many expats living in the Philippines love to complain about the Filipina that try to scam them. However, there are expats living in the Philippines that will be quite happy to scam you.
It wasn’t long after I arrived someone brought up the Legacy investment that many found themselves in. Not everyone promoting it thought they were ripping people off.
There was a bank in the Philippines that was offering 50% interest on deposits. It was the Legacy Group. Soon they went belly up. Some of the guys promoting it ran back to their homeland when it did. Their promoting it wasn’t legal in the first place and people wanted their money back. It was a pure pyramid scheme. They were paying returns out of new investors making “investments.”
I don’t know of any expats that admit to pretending to be an online Filipina. I do know of expats that talked of doing it if things got bad enough. If some are thinking it out loud, I really suspect some of are doing it.
I’d be more worried about some middle age guy in the USA, walking out of a marriage only to find out the girl he was talking to doesn’t exist. Then blowing his head off. A guy wrapped up in himself isn’t likely to think things through to that extent. I think it would stop most of us cold in our tracks from carrying out such a scam. It won’t stop everyone.
What I like to see in a person isn’t very complicated but one of them is pretty dang hard to come by. The first total requirement in a friendship for me is honesty. It is more important with a significant other or even a date than another guy.
The other thing I like to see is not intentionally harming others. If someone lies to me, I’ll probably just avoid them even if I like them. Not much point in talking to someone when you can’t believe anything they say. If you harm others, then I won’t even like you. Then I become judgmental.
When we are looking down on the scamming Filipina, I think it is important to remember dishonesty is not something inherit within them. Poverty will play a role in that. Recently I made that statement on Facebook and it was scoffed at by one guy. He came back with “Or greed.” I didn’t reply to his gross lack of knowledge of how most Filipinos live.
We need too look at ourselves. There are plenty of lying expats living in the Philippines too.
Filed under: Living In The Philippines
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